Deserving Of Connection

We rarely tell others that they are deserving of us — of our presence, our time, our company — in a way that reminds them they are worth something, especially when they might believe otherwise.

We often find it selfish to suggest that someone else deserves us. But I’ve noticed something: too many people feel like they don’t deserve to have friends, or to be around loved ones, or to allow anyone to care about them… especially when that care runs deeper than they could ever imagine.

We’re taught to say, “You deserve someone good.”
We rarely say, “You deserve me — and I deserve you.”

But that mutual recognition is where connection begins.

We tend to bully ourselves into thinking we’re not good enough for others — that we aren’t special in any meaningful way. After all, how could one person possibly be special when there are nearly eight billion people on this planet?

The answer is simple: there aren’t eight billion versions of you.

Everyone is different, yes — but their differences do not diminish yours. Who they are has no bearing on who you are. And that, in itself, is extraordinary.

And to think… that these words may be touched by other hearts — real people, feeling souls. That thought alone brings love into mine.

We are all deserving of others. But the question is:
Are we deserving of the person across the room?

And what if all that stood before you was a mirror?

Would you say you were deserving of your own presence? Of your own reflection? In some cases, that “other” in the mirror is the only one that truly matters. You. Your reflection. Your inner resolve.

But so often, these things get buried beneath the dirt of others’ perceptions.
They do not know you.
They are not you.
They can only observe you — as we can only observe them.

And when one perceived reality clashes with another, chaos often follows. So, in an attempt to avoid that chaos, we bend. We contort. We follow the whims of the wrong “others” — anyone but ourselves.

It’s heartbreaking to realize how many people are no longer themselves.
They’ve convinced themselves that who they’re being is truly who they are,
when in reality, it’s the version that society has chosen for them.

Too many are trying to be someone else entirely — as if society itself is trying to escape the reality of what it has become by reshaping the individuals within it.

And I’ll be honest: I can never quite understand the pain we feel because of it.

The conflicting thoughts. The emotional turmoil.
The act of stepping into someone else’s shoes — not because we want to,
but because we believe we have to, just to be seen.
Just to be accepted.

We observe others.
We imitate.
We perform.
And one day, we wake up indistinguishable from everyone else.

That is the danger of conformity.

But beneath all of this is a quiet truth:

It’s not just a question of whether we are deserving of others,
or whether they are deserving of us.

Neither is possible until we first understand something else entirely:

We must be deserving of ourselves.

We must take care of ourselves.
Be present with ourselves.
Love ourselves.

Because only then can we accept the love that others offer.
Only then can we give love in return, without fear of not being enough.

And when that happens —
When the inner self is honored first —
you will be deserving of others, and others will be deserving of you.

The feeling will be mutual.
But only if you first love yourself.